Tag Archives: Journey



I don’t want to talk to you.

More than anything I don’t want to talk to you.

But more than anything, all I want is to talk to you…

I know you understand.

Or maybe, in my head you understand, and that’s how I want it to be. How I wanted it to be. And maybe it never was that way? Why don’t I know the answer to that?

I don’t understand how I feel.

Is this how grief feels?

There’s an anxiety that won’t leave me alone. It sits in my chest, makes me eat rubbish and fills me with self-loathing.

I don’t know how to be kind to myself. Is that something that can be learnt?

I don’t know how to be in this place. This place that feels like madness, and consistently kicks and screams it’s way out of me, through tears, angst, eating, shouting…none of which helps.

So, tell me, what do I do?


The Journey Never Ends…

The Journey Never Ends…

The twists and turns of life can be surprising. As I get older, I wonder if that’s a good thing, or a bad thing?!!

I’m on a journey. A spiritual journey, and once you get on that train, you can’t get off! Believe me, I’ve tried!

Learning to embrace this ‘trip’ is something that takes a little time, stepping away from fear, and deciding to grow and move forward. Soooo, easy to say, not easy to do.

From my own experience, and from the experience of others I have spoken to, its a trip of major ups and downs. And, when you reach the point growth that you truly start to accept yourself, that’s when everything you ever knew, that wasn’t really who your authentic self relates to, it all falls away. And when it happens, its liberating and terrifying, in equal measure.

But, once you learn to embrace the change, and deal with the emotion that has come with it, its amazing and exciting. The freedom I now feel is something I have never had before.

Upbringing has a lot to do with the fear. The way we are raised and the culture around us is, in the main, responsible for our morality and the expectations we place upon ourselves. That is just the pressure we put on ourselves, not mentioning that put on us by others.

Learning to let it all go, and choose our own lives is hard….but so worth it 🙂